The Messy Middle Age
✨ Welcome to the The Messy Middle Age
I'm L. — a happily childfree woman over 40, living my best life in Bangkok, Thailand. See also: neurodivergent, no contact, introvert, sapphic. 😅
This channel is for fellow Gen X and Xennial girlies who are marching to the beat of their own drum and want to feel less alone on the journey.
So, if you're craving REAL conversations with a deeply wise and insightful guide who unapologetically colors outside of the lines, you're in the right place.
I'm known for saying the quiet part out loud, clapping back QUICK at unsolicited advice, and soaking in the bathtub with LUSH bath bombs for uncountable hours. 🛀🏾
If you feel like we might be kindred spirits, welcome. I'm so glad you're here. ✨
The Messy Middle Age
I'm so glad the "Just be a b*tch — I'm BEGGING you" message from my most recent video is resonating with YOU because I created it with YOU in mind. So thank you for all the love. 💕
Of course it isn't resonating with everyone — because it wasn't CREATED for everyone. And I'm perfectly okay with that. 🤷🏾♀️
But I do know that hit dogs will holler so that's why on the last slide I've shared a comment from another nameless, faceless accoount illustrating EXACTLY why I'm encouraging you to be MORE of a bitch. I didn't actually read their essay because I intentionally don't ingest insults from complete strangers who seem to be intent on arguing for argument's sake.
As I said in the video, "People have become too comfortable insulting and talking cash crazy to complete strangers on the internet. If my content isn't for you — SCROLL. Watch something else."
Because NO ONE is forcing anyone to sit through a video that they're not resonating with. Why put yourself through the torturous experience of hate watching someone you so strongly disagree with that you're compelled to write a THREE PARAGRAPH essay insulting and contradicting them (I skimmed it 😂)?
It's okay if someone doesn't agree with me or like what I'm saying but my comments will NEVER be a democracy or safe space for insults. Because I'm not here to win a popularity contest or convince ANYONE of ANYTHING.
Whether differing or not — share your perspective civilly or I'll remove you from the channel. It's really as simple as that.
I'm here to talk to and for those of you who resonate with what I'm saying and want to get FREE — even if we don't always agree on every detail. That's it. That's all.
So thank you for being here and letting me know that this conversation is resonating with you. 💜
If you haven't watched it yet, check out "Just be a b*tch — I'm BEGGING you" video and let's continue this conversation in the comments. See you there! — https://youtu.be/_UDaXLeD8jM
4 days ago (edited) | [YT] | 101
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The Messy Middle Age
Almost there!! 🎉 I just need 644 more watch hours and 103 more subscribers before I'm fully monetized!! 🥳
Being monetized will allow me to create personal, private, members-only conversations about what it REALLY takes to create success on my own terms as a no contact, neurodivergent woman in my 40s who lives solo in Bangkok.
The first 3 members-only videos are already edited & ready to go! So if you haven't subscribed yet, please do! 🙏🏾 And keep watching videos so I can release my first 3 members-only videos for you to enjoy. 😘✨💜
4 days ago | [YT] | 61
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The Messy Middle Age
No matter what kind of pain or trauma Black women are experiencing, there will always be people who blame us for it.
I love Black women and I love BEING a Black woman. I am intentional and deliberate about the content I create and WHO I create it for.
I create for the unconventional, often overlooked, regularly silenced women who are finding their voice and owning their power in their 40s and beyond.
I unapologetically say the quiet part out loud because I want you to feel SEEN and less alone on the road of self-reclamation, so that you can create a life you deeply love with as much ease as possible.
I KNOW I trigger people — AND I DON'T CARE.
Because I ALSO know that I give voice to what you may have been feeling for YEARS, but not yet clear or confident enough to say.
So, no. My comment section is not a democracy or a safe space for misogynoir. I REGULARLY block people and delete disrespectful comments because I'm not here for them. I'm here for YOU.
While I welcome healthy conversation, I refuse to debate, argue or go back and forth with nameless, faceless, content-less accounts intent on arguing for the sake of argument.
If your differing perspective is so important to you, stand ten toes down and make your OWN content about it.
We're over here getting FREEEEEE.
Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk. 🙏🏾
In the meantime, watch my new video about haters hating — and why you shouldn't care here: https://youtu.be/yLggkbQVhac
"If you are silent about your pain, they'll kill you and say you enjoyed it" - Zora Neale Hurston
1 week ago | [YT] | 58
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The Messy Middle Age
Real talk: when was the last time you let yourself just be ordinary? Just…average and existing?
Most Black girls, particularly if you're an eldest daughter, were never been given that permission slip, so we don't know how to give it to ourselves in adulthood.
If you’ve spent a lifetime feeling like your worth is tied to how much you carry and caretake, consider this a gentle permission slip to set some of it down.
I dive into this more in my most recent video. WATCH IT HERE — https://youtu.be/PIwcgCVYGJc ✨💕
2 weeks ago | [YT] | 27
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The Messy Middle Age
I just joined Threads and need friends! If you’re already over there, are you enjoying it? How are you connecting with people? Please find me and let’s chat! 💕✨
www.threads.com/@the.messy.middle.age
2 weeks ago | [YT] | 33
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The Messy Middle Age
First pic was taken 13 years ago today. I was a makeup artist working at MAC Macy’s Lenox in Atlanta. In love with my bald head and obsessed with Nightmoth lip pencil. Lived and loved in Atlanta for 12 years and now happy to call Bangkok home. Life is generous. ✨💕
Btw — Low/no hair will alwayssssss & forever be my favorite haircut!
3 weeks ago | [YT] | 116
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The Messy Middle Age
ASK ME ANYTHING: Hi friends! 🎙️In celebration of my one-year living in Bangkok, I'm going LIVE Saturday, October 10th around 9pm ET/6pm PT. I'll be answering questions about my experience defecting from Black Excellence and moving to Bangkok.
Drop your questions below, so I can be sure to answer them, even if you're not able to join us live! ✨💕 You can also message me on my brand new IG account if you don't want to post publicly — www.instagram.com/the.messy.middle.age/
4 weeks ago (edited) | [YT] | 16
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The Messy Middle Age
What has been the hardest part of walking away from conventional expectations, and charting your own course?
1 month ago | [YT] | 9
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The Messy Middle Age
Shout out to all my over it, overburdened, "strong" eldest daughters! If you're a parentified "strong" daughter tired of the expectations, responsibilites and duties someone else gave you, and you're feeling like your life belongs to them (not you), this for you. (Because I TRULY understand the struggle. 🫠)
Introducing the "Strong Daughter Reset"!
It's an 18-page self-led practice of questions, prompts, deep dives and explorations to help you start separating the "strong daughter" roles you've inherited from the ones you *actually* want—so that you can start creating YOUR dream life on YOUR own terms.
🌹 Get yours here ➞ tinyurl.com/strong-daughter-reset
💸 LIMITED TIME 50% off coupon just for my YouTube peeps!
➞ SD-DEFECTOR
1 month ago (edited) | [YT] | 22
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