Narc Free Living® | Shannon Savoy HTX

Narcissists have one job: to kill, steal, and destroy. Some more, some less.

And no, we’re not tap dancing around this.

Stop trying to reason with what has repeatedly shown you its fruit. Stop trying to coexist with destructive behavior. Stop exhausting yourself trying to understand someone who is committed to harming, manipulating, controlling, confusing, or destabilizing you.

There comes a point when discernment requires movement.

Scripture says:
“The prudent see danger and take refuge, but the simple keep going and pay the penalty.” Proverbs 22:3

Read that again.

The prudent person doesn’t see danger and say, “Maybe if I explain myself one more time…”

They don’t see danger and schedule another meeting with it.

They don’t see danger and call it love because they’ve known it for 20 years.

They take refuge.

Once you have discerned the pattern, your assignment is not to fix the narcissist. YOU CAN’T.

Your assignment is to get yourself out of harm’s way and begin healing what the relationship wounded in you.

And sometimes getting away isn’t only physical. It may mean emotional separation, stronger boundaries, ending access, refusing circular conversations, or no longer allowing someone to occupy your mind long after they’ve left the room.

You don’t need their understanding to heal. You don’t need their agreement to leave. And you don’t need their apology or acknowledgement to move forward.

If you’re ready to stop surviving the relationship and start healing your soul, schedule a 1:1 session with me.

We’ll work through the trauma, patterns, boundaries, nervous-system responses, and soul wounds that can keep you connected to what God is calling you out of.

Book your 1:1 session: www.narcfreeliving.com

Discern it. Distance yourself from it. Heal from it. Move forward.

#SoulCare #NarcFreeLiving #NarcissistAbuse #ShannonSavoy

21 hours ago | [YT] | 96

Narc Free Living® | Shannon Savoy HTX

You can have a calling on your life and still need healing in your soul.

The pulpit is not a treatment plan. Neither is a degree, therapist, or counselor certification.

Consider this case study:

He’s a pastor. She’s a ministry leader. Both have survived abuse. Neither has tended to the wounds it left behind.

He delivers powerful sermons, then goes home replaying conversations, doubting himself and struggling to sleep.

She leads with excellence, but stays on guard, feels guilty saying no and carries shame behind her smile.

They look fine on the outside. They serve faithfully. Their calling is real. So is their pain.

The signs in this graphic don’t disappear because someone calls you Pastor, Counselor, Coach or Minister.

Sometimes we mistake being needed for being well. Catch it. 🔥 We pour into everyone else while our own soul is running on empty.

Being in ministry or a leader makes soul care ESSENTIAL. You need safe community, accountability, rest and somewhere you can receive care without having to lead.

Jesus invited His disciples to come away and rest. You don’t have to earn permission to do the same.

Your title does not cancel your humanity. Needing support does not disqualify your calling.

Get SOULOLOGY and begin tending to the wounds beneath the work. Show up as the version of you God intended, rather than allowing the survival patterns abuse shaped to keep directing your life. 💜⚔️

SOULOLOGY:
a.co/d/0c2XA9NK

Recovering from abuse? Schedule your 1:1 soul care session: www.picktime.com/NarcFreeLivingLLC

Who cares for your soul while you’re caring for everyone else?

#Soulology #SoulCare #MinistryLeaders #AbuseRecovery #narcfreeliving

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1 day ago | [YT] | 58

Narc Free Living® | Shannon Savoy HTX

Imagine starting a smear campaign to ruin your reputation.

Imagine trying to turn your support system against you.

Imagine constructing calculated lies, twisting the truth, rewriting history, and trying to make you look like the crazy one.

Now imagine this…

You pay them dust.

Imagine you stop defending yourself to people committed to misunderstanding you.

Imagine you give no energy, no attention, and no access to the lies.

Imagine you stop checking to see what they’re saying.

Imagine you stop trying to clear your name in rooms you were never invited into.

Imagine you realize that everybody who believes a lie about you without ever talking to you is not your assignment to convince.

Now imagine taking all that energy and putting it back into YOU.

Imagine doing the work.

Healing the soul wounds.
Renewing your mind.
Rebuilding your confidence.
Regulating your nervous system.
Strengthening your relationship with God.
Learning to trust yourself again.

Getting your joy back. Getting your voice back. Getting YOU back.

Imagine that.

Now…

Look at you.

You’re not explaining. You’re not chasing. You’re not proving. You’re healing.

And THAT is what I’m here for.

Not to help you obsess over the narcissist.

I’m here to help you heal from what happened to you so what they did doesn’t become who you are.

If you’re ready to do the deeper work, I offer 1:1 Pastoral Counseling & Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Coaching to help you process, heal, rebuild, and move forward.

And for those ready to begin the deeper work of healing the soul, SOULOLOGY was written for this journey.

🔗 Book your 1:1: www.narcfreeliving.com
📖 Get SOULOLOGY: A Kingdom Blueprint for Healing the Mind, Will, and Emotions
SOULOLOGY = The study of the soul + How it breaks + How it heals.
a.co/d/0c2XA9NK
 
You don’t have to win the smear campaign. You have a life to live. Go WIN. 🏆

#NarcissisticAbuseRecovery #SmearCampaign #SoulHealing #NarcFreeLiving #Soulology

6 days ago | [YT] | 143

Narc Free Living® | Shannon Savoy HTX

How’s your soul?

At some point, healing has to stop being about studying narcissists and start being about understanding YOU.

That’s where my work with you begins.

I help survivors of abuse move beyond awareness and into real healing. I don’t just discuss the five ways and tens signs of how to recognize a narcissist. My goal is not to keep you in state of victimization but of victory!

I’m Shannon Savoy, M.A., a Trauma-Informed Abuse Recovery Coach, Pastoral Counselor, Christian Chaplain, and Board Certified Christian Counselor, specializing in narcissistic abuse recovery.

My work is primarily with women who are ready to go deeper than identifying what someone else did to them. We examine the fruit and discern the root. That means looking honestly at trauma, patterns, being accountable for their choices, understanding their beliefs, implementing boundaries, restoring identity, examining spiritual and emotional health, and the places that still need healing.

I believe in compassion, but I also believe in loving accountability. Healing requires honesty. We cannot change what we refuse to confront.

I combine biblical truth, trauma-informed care, practical education, and strategic guidance to help you heal, rebuild, grow, and move forward with clarity.

If you’re ready to do the work, this is where we start.

Heal. Get clarity. Take the next step. Your next chapter matters.

Swipe to read reviews. ⭐️ ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

www.picktime.com/NarcFreeLivingLLC#book/date

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1 week ago | [YT] | 64

Narc Free Living® | Shannon Savoy HTX

THE PULPIT DOES NOT MAKE A PERSON SAFE 🚨

Please stop assuming that everyone standing behind a pulpit was sent by God.

A title does not prove character. A microphone does not establish spiritual authority. And a pulpit does not transform abusive teaching into biblical truth.

Pastor Steven Anderson recently made dangerous remarks suggesting that a wife is wrong for calling the police after being physically abused by her husband.

Let me be absolutely clear: what he said was wrong.

If your spouse hits you, verbally abuses you, gaslights you, threatens you, sexually violates you, restrains you, or places you or your children in danger, you have every right to call the police.

You have the right to leave. You have the right to seek legal protection. You have the right to pursue separation or divorce. You have the right to protect your children. You have the right to get somewhere safe.

Marriage does not give another person permission to abuse you. Submission does not mean surrendering your safety, dignity, voice, or legal rights.

Also, please do not conflate God with abusive religious “leaders”.🙏🏽

God is not the person who manipulated you. God is not the pastor who silenced you. God is not the leader who used Scripture to protect an abuser while demanding that the victim remain quiet.

That is spiritual abuse, not spiritual authority. ⚔️

Not everyone attending church reflects Christ. Not everyone preaching Scripture submits to Scripture. Some people desire the pulpit because they want to serve. Others are drawn to the access, admiration, power, attention, and control it can provide.

That is why Jesus told us to examine fruit.

Does the leader demonstrate humility, accountability, gentleness, self-control, and love? Or does the leader use fear, intimidation, humiliation, and Scripture to control people?

Remember, do not confuse charisma with character. Don’t confuse dominance with authority. Do not confuse cruelty with conviction.
And please do not confuse an abusive man or woman with The Most High.

The Bible commands husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the church. Christ sacrificed Himself for the church. He did not terrorize, degrade, or assault her.

1 Corinthians 13 tells us that love is patient and kind. Love does not dishonor others. It is not self-seeking. Love and abuse do not coexist.

A person may say, “I love you,” while abusing you, but abuse is not love.

If you are being harmed, God is not asking you to remain in danger to prove your faithfulness. Seeking safety is not rebellion. Reporting a crime is not betrayal. Protecting yourself and your children is not ungodly.

Please reach out to a trusted domestic-violence advocate, create a safety plan, preserve evidence when it is safe to do so, and contact emergency services if you are in immediate danger.

Your life matters. Your safety matters. Your children matter.

And no pulpit, pastor, marriage certificate, or misused Bible verse changes that truth.

Signed,

Shannon Savoy, M.A.
Pastoral Counselor
Christian Chaplain
Crisis response & Trauma Recovery
Board Certified Christian Counselor
Narcissistic Abuse Awareness Coach

www.narcfreeliving.com

1 week ago | [YT] | 35

Narc Free Living® | Shannon Savoy HTX

🎉 I am officially certified in Christian Chaplaincy!

This certification is not simply another title behind my name. It expands my ability to serve individuals and families through some of life’s most sacred, joyful, and difficult moments.

I am now better equipped to provide compassionate, Christ-centered support during:

• Weddings and important life transitions
• Funerals, grief, and bereavement
• Family crises and traumatic experiences
• Hospitalizations and times of uncertainty
• Spiritual care, prayer, encouragement, and emotional support
• Moments when people simply need someone safe to be present

This certification builds upon my Master’s degree in Pastoral Counseling with a specialization in Crisis Response and Trauma Recovery, as well as my work as a Board Certified Christian Counselor and Certified Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Coach.

Every season of preparation has strengthened my ability to help people heal, find clarity, rebuild their lives, and reconnect with God, themselves, and their purpose.

I am grateful for the opportunity to continue serving my community with greater knowledge, compassion, wisdom, and care.

Some people will talk. Let them.

Build. Serve. Grow.

Shannon Savoy, M.A.
Christian Chaplain
Board Certified Christian Counselor
Pastoral Counselor
Certified Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Coach
Trauma and Crisis Response Specialist


#ChristianChaplain #PastoralCounseling #TraumaRecovery #ChristianCounselor #CommunityCare

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1 week ago | [YT] | 180

Narc Free Living® | Shannon Savoy HTX

Be the reason another woman thinks, “Maybe I can too.”

That’s the kind of woman I want to be.

Not competition. Inspiration. Not comparison. Community. Not flattery. Truth spoken in love.

I want to be the woman who encourages other women, celebrates them, makes room for them, prays for them, and when necessary, lovingly holds them accountable.

And I want those kinds of women around me too.

Women who are phenomenal in their own right. Women who aren’t intimidated by another woman’s light because they know they carry their own. Women who will celebrate me, challenge me, correct me in love, and remind me who I am when life gets heavy.

I don’t want my story to make another woman think, “Look at her.”

I want it to make her think, “If God brought her through, maybe I can make it through too.”

If I can walk out of abuse, you can too.
If I can rebuild after heartbreak, you can too. If I can rediscover my voice, you can too. If I can heal, grow, begin again, and become a woman I once couldn’t imagine being, you can too.

We don’t have to dim another woman’s light to make ours brighter.

Be the woman whose life gives another woman permission to believe again.

Be the reason she thinks, “I can too.” 💗

2 weeks ago | [YT] | 204

Narc Free Living® | Shannon Savoy HTX

So well said. 💜🙏🏾 Thank God for not leaving us behind. ‪@ThegospelofNarc‬

2 weeks ago | [YT] | 5

Narc Free Living® | Shannon Savoy HTX

Dear Believer Who Has Been Hurt by the Church,

I want you to know that I am not going to insult your experience by telling you, “The church is full of imperfect people. Just get over it. Just go find another one.”

Sometimes it was more than imperfection. Sometimes it was abuse. Sometimes it was manipulation, control, humiliation, spiritual intimidation, financial exploitation, sexual misconduct, misuse of Scripture, or leadership that demanded accountability from everyone except themselves.

And we need to be able to tell the truth about that.

The Bible does.

Scripture does not romanticize religious institutions or religious leadership. We see corrupt priests, false prophets, false apostles, hypocrisy, greed, sexual immorality, division, exploitation, and leaders who abused their authority.

God did not hide those stories to protect the reputation of His people.

So neither should we.

Addressing abuse does not make the Church look bad. Refusing to address abuse, covering it up, silencing wounded people, and protecting institutions or leaders at their expense does.

We do not protect Christ by protecting dysfunction.

There are real people who have been wounded in places where they went looking for God.

And sometimes leaving a harmful congregation is not rebellion.

Sometimes it is wisdom. Sometimes it is necessary.
Sometimes God may call you out of one environment before He shows you where you belong next.

But this is where I believe we need better language about what we call “the Church.”

I often distinguish between what I call the four-wall church and the remnant.

When I say “four-wall church,” I am talking about the institutional expression of church: the building, the system, organization, denomination, programs, leadership structures, Sunday services, and systems we commonly associate with “going to church.”

When I speak about the remnant, I am speaking about believers who remain faithful to Christ and His truth, wherever God has planted them.

But these terms are not automatically opposites. There are faithful believers inside four-wall churches.

There are healthy, biblical congregations doing beautiful Kingdom work.

And simply leaving institutional church does not automatically make someone part of a faithful remnant.

The building is not the enemy. Christlessness is.

The question is not simply whether you are inside or outside four walls.

The question is: Are we faithful to Christ?

Because the four-wall church and the Body of Christ are not synonymous.

A building can close and the Body still exists.
A denomination can fail and the Body still exists.
A ministry can fall apart and the Body still exists.
A corrupt leader can be removed and the Body still exists.

You can leave a congregation and STILL belong to Christ.

Why? Because we are the Body.

We also need to remember that simply speaking about God on social media does not make someone a pastor, teacher, prophet, or spiritual authority. A platform is not the same as a calling, and visibility is not the same as biblical qualification. Followers, likes, confidence, and the ability to quote Scripture do not automatically establish someone as a trustworthy leader. Test what is being taught. Examine the fruit. Look for humility, accountability, sound doctrine, integrity, and a life that reflects Christ. No one should receive spiritual authority merely because they have built an audience online. We are simply fulfilling the Great Commission. 💜

Thank God for the grace to grow beyond

The Church is not ultimately brick, mortar, branding, denominations, conferences, titles, platforms, or organizations.

It is people redeemed by Jesus Christ and joined to Him and to one another.

That is why I will never tell someone who has been spiritually abused, “Just go back to church.”

Go back where??
Under whose leadership?
What are they teaching?
How are they handling Scripture?
Can leadership be questioned?
Is there accountability?
How are vulnerable people treated?
What happens when someone reports abuse?
Is the fruit of the Spirit evident?

And most importantly, is Yeshua actually at the center?

We are not in the business of sending people into unhealthy environments just so we can say they attend church.

But neither are we in the business of teaching people that permanent isolation is the answer.

The New Testament repeatedly calls believers into relationship with one another.

Pray for one another. Encourage one another. Teach one another. Serve one another. Bear one another’s burdens. Forgive one another. Use your gifts for one another.

We need each other.

Christian community may not look identical in every season or every place.

There are traditional congregations.
There are house churches.
There are small groups.
There are discipleship communities online and in your community.

There are ministries operating beyond traditional four walls. And there are believers in places where finding a healthy, biblically sound local congregation is genuinely difficult.

This is why I refuse to make blanket statements.

I will not tell everybody, “Go back.”
And I will not tell everybody, “Stay away.”
Both answers can bypass Holy Spirit discernment.

Heal the soul wounds & be led by the Holy Spirit while remaining anchored in Scripture.

There may be seasons when God leads you out.
There may be seasons when He pulls you close.
There may be seasons of deconstruction when He dismantles things you were taught incorrectly.
There may be seasons when He heals wounds caused by people who claimed to represent Him.

And there may be seasons when He leads you into healthy Christian community and teaches you that what you experienced before was not what biblical community was supposed to be.

But through every season:

Do not leave Christ.

Do not allow what someone did in His name to become your definition of Him. And do not allow your wound to become your permanent theology.

Heal.
Grieve.
Study.
Consecrate.
Ask questions.
Test what you were taught against Scripture.
Develop discernment.
Establish boundaries.
Find accountability, mentors, and discipleship.
Remain connected to the Body in healthy ways.

And understand that honoring spiritual leadership never means surrendering your God-given responsibility to test what you hear against Scripture.

No pastor, prophet, apostle, bishop, teacher, denomination, ministry, or institution gets the place that belongs to Jesus.

So perhaps we need to stop making “Do you go to church?” the only measurement of someone’s relationship with God.

I want to know:

Are you following Jesus?
Are you submitted to Scripture?
Are you bearing good fruit?
Are you accountable?
Are you growing in holiness and love?
Are you connected to other believers?
Are you serving?
Are you stewarding your God given gifts?
Are you allowing yourself to be corrected?
Are you becoming more like Christ?

Because truth be, you can sit inside four walls every Sunday and still be spiritually unformed.

And you can be outside those four walls for a season while God is doing some of the deepest formation of your life.

The goal was never merely getting people into buildings.

The goal is making disciples of Jesus Christ.

So yes, tell the truth about church hurt - whether you believe in it or not.

Address abuse.
Hold leaders accountable.
Protect the sheep, the poor, widowed, and the vulnerable.
Leave environments that are dangerous when necessary.
But don’t throw Jesus away because someone pretending to be of Him misrepresented Him.

The institution is not your Savior.
The pastor is not your Savior.
The denomination is not your Savior.
The remnant is not your Savior.

Jesus is.

And wherever He leads us, inside the four walls or beyond them, may we remain faithful to Him and connected to His Body.

Much love,

Shannon 🫶🏽⚔️

2 weeks ago | [YT] | 198