Mark DeJesus

One of the hallmark traits of a Christian Perfectionist is the influence of "Black and White -- All or Nothing Thinking," (BWANT) a way of seeing much of your life through intense rigidity, rules and constriction where you only see two extreme options for many things in your life.

Christians can become very vulnerable to this, because we have some strong fundamental beliefs we stand on, such as "Jesus is the only way." and "The Bible is the Word of God." We stand on core values that are based on the Scriptures.

However, without it being built on the grace of Jesus Christ, our lens of how we relate to our life will get distorted. BWANT thinking can take over.

When a perfectionist mindset of "just right, but never enough" invades, BWANT hijacks how we relate to God, ourselves and the world around us.

‣ Life with God is pressurized under rules and law.
‣ You become hard on yourself and self-condemning.
‣ Relationships become rigid, harsh and weighed down by legalism and control.

In addition, when you are in hardship and struggle--where you may feel stuck--BWANT will seek to keep you stuck, telling you there are only two extreme options to what you are going through. Keeping you from seeing the grace and empowering steps you can take.

‣ “I need to start this today or don’t do it at all.”
‣ “I need to feel 100% confident or I shouldn’t even start this.”
‣ “If God doesn’t do something now, my life is sunk.”

BWANT shows up in so many ways:
‣ "If I embrace grace, I will become lawless."
‣ "If God doesn't show up today, my life is over."
‣ "If I rest, then it means I will become lazy."
‣ "If I am anxious, then it means I don't trust God."
‣ "If I believe God accepts me in Christ, I will say sin is ok."
‣ "If someone triggers me, I need to cut them off."
‣ "I either need to tolerate abuse or just be alone."

This BWANT can be a survival strategy to feel safe, get everything figured out and gain a sense of perfect certainty. But it keeps us trapped.

It pushes a "rule obsessed" mindset to find safety.

We seek God on a basis of making sure we’ve got all the rules figured out and we follow them with precision.

We’re filled with a pressure to gain absolute certainty. Uncertainty is not allowed to exist.

We must have EVERYTHING figured out before we can move forward.

We seek to avoid being wrong or looking wrong at all costs.

Get lost in emotional “rigidity” in how we relate to people around us.

Blanket statements get used to shut people down and keep them at a distance.

It can become very difficult to have conversations that involve nuance, layers and other perspectives.

Over time, the list of what you "stand for" becomes endless, rigid, and argumentative.
Unfortunately, BWANT patterns rule the waves of social media exchange, keeping people from life changing interactions that happen best within heart-to-heart conversations. But our modern exchange is quick to shut people down, cut them off and "win the argument," yet block ourselves from deeper growth and maturity.

I saw this influence in my own life. It was modeled in my upbringing and church life. But I had to realize that we have been infected by a leaven that has occluded us from the beauty of God's life changing love and the empowering grace of Jesus Christ to transform our lives.

This is something I have documented in my book, "Freedom from Just Right But Never Enough: The Christian Perfectionist Healing Journey."

The recognition has been life changing and the recovery journey has opened up a love and grace that has changed my life forever.

I have more on this in an upcoming video.

I encourage you to join me on the journey: markdejesus.com/cpbook

#ChristianPerfectionism #perfectionism

12 hours ago | [YT] | 74

Mark DeJesus

No Sunday live today, but we look forward to being back next Sunday for more Bible study, Q&A feedback and more!

2 days ago | [YT] | 46

Mark DeJesus

Do you have any of these struggles when it comes to your relationship with God? If so, you may be under the influence of Christian Perfectionism. Join me in learning how this "just right but never enough" pressure works and begin a healing and renwal journey: markdejesus.com/cpbook #christianperfectionism #perfectionism #OCD

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1 week ago | [YT] | 292

Mark DeJesus

WARNING: Thank you all for your kind support of my newest book release. Unfortunately, there are fraudulent/copycat versions being pushed out there. Be sure to use my link from my web site or the one that shows my name specifically. I am dealing with this issue with amazon. Thank you. markdejesus.com/cpbook

1 month ago (edited) | [YT] | 168

Mark DeJesus

Here are some words that describe the internal life of a perfectionist. If you find yourself living under them on a regular basis, you can embrace a healing journey: ttps://markdejesus.com/cpbook
#christianperfectionism

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2 months ago | [YT] | 329

Mark DeJesus

What is Christian Perfectionism? Its a mindset and lifestyle based on performance, with a PRESSURE that communicates intensely that you need to DO MORE and DO BETTER to get your standing with God, "Just Right." It's a life of "just right but never enough that you were not designed to live with.

I invite you to join me on the healing journey: markdejesus.com/cpbook
#christianperfectionism

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2 months ago | [YT] | 400

Mark DeJesus

New book is now available in audio format through Audible! Freedom from Just Right But Never Enough: The Christian Perfectionist Healing Journey markdejesus.com/cpbook #ChristianPerfectionism

2 months ago | [YT] | 179

Mark DeJesus

I am so excited to be able to share this new resource that has changed my life in so many ways. Get a copy of this book and one for a friend!
markdejesus.com/cpbook #ChristianPerfectionism

2 months ago | [YT] | 348

Mark DeJesus

This is what condemnation produces and NONE of it is how God in Christ Jesus relates to His children. #nocondemnation
https://youtu.be/J7uCzAeDMXY

2 months ago | [YT] | 353

Mark DeJesus

Proofs are in. New book coming out very soon on paperback, hardcover, kindle and audio!

2 months ago | [YT] | 357